It’s that time again! When grown men and women strip down to their skivvies in front of a live audience, just so we can watch them flex on the scale. That’s right folks, it’s weigh-in day for UFC Vegas 74.
Now, you might be thinking to yourself, “Why would I possibly want to watch these fighters make weight?” But let me tell you, there is nothing more thrilling than watching someone hold their breath for an extended period of time while trying not to pass out on national television.
And lucky us, we get to witness all 26 fighters step onto the scale today. It’s like a circus sideshow come to life – but with more grappling and less juggling.
In the main event showdown between Kai Kara-France and Amir Albazi, they better not dare tip the scales past 126 pounds or else…they’ll still fight anyways because non-title fights don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things.
Oh look! ESPN+ is carrying this event too? Who would have guessed!? Thank goodness for premium streaming services giving us access to these elite athletes throwing fists at each other for our entertainment pleasure!
But wait there’s more! For those who find making weight boring (you’re crazy), we’ve got some actual fighting scheduled as well. And by actual fighting I mean beating each other senseless within designated rulesets determined by state athletic commission guidelines.
Alex Caceres vs Daniel Pineda promises kicks and punches galore; Tim Elliott vs Victor Altamirano sounds like a race car derby condensed into human form; while Karine Silva vs Ketlen Souza will provide high-level ground game action…and plenty of hair-pulling screams!
Let’s not forget about Andrei Arlovski though – he may be pushing fifty years old but turns out getting hit in your face repeatedly doesn’t appear to affect father-time. Talk about defying expectations!
To avoid getting caught up in the UFC’s marketing hype, just remember that we are all tuning in to watch people violently chase a hollow victory fueled by testosterone and adrenaline. But hey, if it means a few hours of escape from everyday life then why not?
So ladies and gentlemen, grab your popcorn (or kale chips for those health-conscious individuals) and settle into your seats as we giddily cheer on these fighters caring more about weigh-ins than aesthetics.
But seriously folks, what’s with the obsession over weight anyway? As if being locked into a certain number defines our worth as human beings. Let’s just enjoy the spectacle for what it is – some good ol’ fashioned violence wrapped up in pretty gloves and shiny shorts.
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UFC Vegas 74 weigh-in video