Well folks, it’s time to celebrate! Large U.S banks including JPMorgan Chase, Wells Fargo, and Morgan Stanley have announced their plans to raise their quarterly dividends after successfully passing the Federal Reserve’s annual stress test. It looks like these banks are ready to make it rain (or at least drizzle) for their shareholders.

JPMorgan is planning to boost its payout from $1 a share to a whopping $1.05 a share starting in the third quarter. But hold your horses folks, this increase is still subject to board approval. We wouldn’t want Jamie Dimon’s dreams of making it rain to be crushed now, would we?

In a statement, JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon said, “The Federal Reserve’s 2023 stress test results show that banks are resilient – even while withstanding severe shocks – and continue to serve as a pillar of strength to the financial system and broader economy.” Oh Jamie, you flatter us with your kind words. We all know you just want to give your shareholders a little something extra.

Not wanting to miss out on the party, Wells Fargo has also announced its plans to increase its dividend. They’re going from 30 cents a share to 35 cents a share. Whoa there Wells Fargo, don’t get too wild now. We can’t have you stealing JPMorgan’s thunder.

And let’s not forget about Morgan Stanley! They’re boosting their payout from 77.5 cents a share to an impressive 85 cents a share. It looks like they’re trying to one-up their buddies over at JPMorgan and Wells Fargo. The competition is fierce in the world of dividends!

But wait…who announced the largest per-share boost among big banks? Drumroll please…it’s Goldman Sachs! They’ve decided to take their dividend from $2.50 a share all the way up to $2.75 a share. Talk about making it rain! Looks like someone wants their shareholders swimming in cash.

Ah yes, Citigroup has also joined in on the fun (or should we say small amount of fun). They’ve announced that they’ll be boosting their quarterly payout from 51 cents a share to a whopping 53 cents a share. Hey, every little bit counts, right?

But why such a small increase, you ask? Well, it seems that while JPMorgan and Goldman Sachs surprised everyone with better-than-expected results, Citigroup wasn’t so lucky. They were one of the banks that saw their capital buffers increase after the stress test. Bummer.

Citigroup CEO Jane Fraser tried to put on a brave face and said in her company’s release, “While we would have clearly preferred not to see an increase in our stress capital buffer, these results still demonstrate Citi’s financial resilience through all economic environments.” Way to spin it, Jane! We still think you’re cool (even if your dividend increase isn’t).

Now here’s where things get interesting (or not so interesting). None of the big banks have announced specific plans for share repurchases just yet. It seems they’re holding onto their cash like Scrooge McDuck holds onto his gold coins.

JPMorgan and Morgan Stanley did mention that they could buy back shares using previously-announced repurchase plans. Wells Fargo took it up a notch by saying they had the “capacity to repurchase common stock” over the next year. Oh Wells Fargo, always trying to show off!

Analysts have predicted that banks would be more conservative with their capital-return plans this year because of international banking regulations and potential future loan losses due to an upcoming recession (yikes!). So maybe it’s best for them to hold onto their cash for now.

Well folks, it’s time to celebrate! Large U.S banks including JPMorgan Chase, Wells Fargo, and Morgan Stanley have announced their plans to raise their quarterly dividends after successfully passing the Federal Reserve’s annual stress test. It looks like these banks are ready to make it rain (or at least drizzle) for their shareholders.

JPMorgan is planning to boost its payout from $1 a share to a whopping $1.05 a share starting in the third quarter. But hold your horses folks, this increase is still subject to board approval. We wouldn’t want Jamie Dimon’s dreams of making it rain to be crushed now, would we?

In a statement, JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon said, “The Federal Reserve’s 2023 stress test results show that banks are resilient – even while withstanding severe shocks – and continue to serve as a pillar of strength to the financial system and broader economy.” Oh Jamie, you flatter us with your kind words. We all know you just want to give your shareholders a little something extra.

Not wanting to miss out on the party, Wells Fargo has also announced its plans to increase its dividend. They’re going from 30 cents a share to 35 cents a share. Whoa there Wells Fargo, don’t get too wild now. We can’t have you stealing JPMorgan’s thunder.

And let’s not forget about Morgan Stanley! They’re boosting their payout from 77.5 cents a share to an impressive 85 cents a share. It looks like they’re trying to one-up their buddies over at JPMorgan and Wells Fargo. The competition is fierce in the world of dividends!

But wait…who announced the largest per-share boost among big banks? Drumroll please…it’s Goldman Sachs! They’ve decided to take their dividend from $2.50 a share all the way up to $2.75 a share. Talk about making it rain! Looks like someone wants their shareholders swimming in cash.

Ah yes, Citigroup has also joined in on the fun (or should we say small amount of fun). They’ve announced that they’ll be boosting their quarterly payout from 51 cents a share to a whopping 53 cents a share. Hey, every little bit counts, right?

But why such a small increase, you ask? Well, it seems that while JPMorgan and Goldman Sachs surprised everyone with better-than-expected results, Citigroup wasn’t so lucky. They were one of the banks that saw their capital buffers increase after the stress test. Bummer.

Citigroup CEO Jane Fraser tried to put on a brave face and said in her company’s release, “While we would have clearly preferred not to see an increase in our stress capital buffer, these results still demonstrate Citi’s financial resilience through all economic environments.” Way to spin it, Jane! We still think you’re cool (even if your dividend increase isn’t).

Now here’s where things get interesting (or not so interesting). None of the big banks have announced specific plans for share repurchases just yet. It seems they’re holding onto their cash like Scrooge McDuck holds onto his gold coins.

JPMorgan and Morgan Stanley did mention that they could buy back shares using previously-announced repurchase plans. Wells Fargo took it up a notch by saying they had the “capacity to repurchase common stock” over the next year. Oh Wells Fargo, always trying to show off!

Analysts have predicted that banks would be more conservative with their capital-return plans this year because of international banking regulations and potential future loan losses due to an upcoming recession (yikes!). So maybe it’s best for them to hold onto their cash for now.