Traveling to San Juan’s Condado Neighborhood: A Comprehensive Guide
So, you’re planning a trip to Puerto Rico and have heard about the wonders of Condado. Well, buckle up because we’ve got all the dirt on this popular San Juan neighborhood.
The Beachfront Location that Everyone Fawns Over
Let’s address the elephant in the room – everyone is goo-goo gaga over Condado’s beachfront location. And why wouldn’t they be? The ocean air fills your lungs as you lounge on white sandy beaches getting cooked alive by UVA rays.
If sunburn isn’t your thing (seriously?), take a dip in the crystal clear waters where, if you’re lucky enough, you might catch hepatitis or e-coli!
The Hotels – Because Sleeping Outside Isn’t an Option
Luckily for us travelers who don’t enjoy being eaten alive by mosquitos and small rodents (who here DOESN’T love bed bugs?), there are plenty hotels available in Condado!
You can choose from high-end resorts like La Concha Resort, which boasts multiple pools so you never have to worry about those pesky children ruining your ‘adult’ swim. Or if you’re on a budget, there’s the Canario Boutique Hotel where you can experience island life with limited privacy as well as creepy crawlies.
Shopping – Because Who Doesn’t Love Overpriced Souvenirs?
Now let’s talk about shopping in Condado. There are plenty of souvenir shops where you can find overpriced t-shirts and magnets that were probably made in China (but would we have it any other way?).
If that doesn’t strike your fancy, check out the high-end stores like Gucci and Louis Vuitton where dropping rent money on a purse is perfectly acceptable (right?). Just don’t forget to take lots of pictures for Instagram so all your followers know how much cooler than them you are because YOU bought an expensive scarf while they sit at home eating ramen noodles.
Nightlife – Get Ready to Party Like It’s 1999!
Are you ready to dance the night away? Because Condado has got just what you need! Sip on over-priced cocktails while listening to music so loud your ears will be ringing long after last call.
If clubbing isn’t really your scene, there are plenty of bars around offering watered-down drinks served by bartenders who look like they’d rather be anywhere else but serving hungover tourists. Just make sure not to wear anything too nice or valuable since wearing flip-flops may bring unnecessary attention towards oneself!
The Food – ¡Ay bendito! Belly Up To Puerto Rican Cuisine
Puerto Rican cuisine is sure to leave both your stomach and wallet full during your stay in Condado. Traditional dishes include mofongo (a mashed mixture of plantains & pork), arroz con gandules (rice with pigeon peas), and alcapurria (a fritter made with root vegetables).
If you’re looking for something exotic, try out Vaca Brava where diners can pick their own lobster before it’s prepared – because who doesn’t want to watch something they’ve picked be boiled alive right in front of them?
In conclusion, Condado is a neighborhood that epitomizes everything you never knew you wanted from the perfect vacation spot!
The beaches will leave your skin glowing…or peel-y. The hotels won’t let even one mosquito infiltrate because let’s face it; nothing screams relaxation like leaving on a wheelchair after getting bit by THE bug.
And whether it’s day or night – there’s plenty to do! Whether bar hopping until dawn drags your morale all the way down while butchering Puerto Rican songs horribly drunk or shopping ’til ya drop so fake followers know just how high-end and exponentially expensive your life truly has become.
You might need antibiotics afterwards but hey #yolo, right? Head over to Condado today!