Holy tech gadgets, Batman! President Ranil Wickremesinghe has just dropped some major news on the Sri Lankan technology scene. He’s only gone and announced plans for a Digital Promotion Agency. Can you even deal right now? We certainly can’t!
But what does it all mean, we hear your tiny brains ask? Well, it basically implies the development of computer applications aimed at collecting and monitoring data from various government entities in Sri Lanka.
Now, this isn’t just any old digital agency; nope, this one is going to ensure that every single pixel is strategically placed like a Jenga tower. Now there won’t be a single glitch in sight – not even when Uncle Ravi tries to suggest installing Windows 98 because “it worked fine back in his day”.
It’s about time someone got savvy with our beloved country’s technological advancement because let’s face it – we’re absolutely ‘rocking-it-old-school’. Heck, we still have ancient projectors gathering dust from circa 1990s that are living their best life by pretending they’re relevant enough to be used today.
In light of recent circumstances (we’ll spare you the details as we know how much anxiety-ridden folks love reading doom-and-gloom articles), establishing an agency such as this would prove pretty darn useful.
What do you think will happen once we have organised data collection and monitoring systems put into place? That former Presidents trying to flee the island on private jets will suddenly find themselves unable to take off due to cumbersome boxes stuffed full of unorganised papers?
Or perhaps Uncle Percy who works down at Main Street Appuhamy Kade won’t be able to slyly fill up his own petrol tank while dealing with government accounts?
Who knows, but we’re looking forward to finding out. We envision a future of organised technological bliss akin to Tony Stark’s laboratory (except that it won’t be destroyed by Thanos).
It could potentially even lead the way for other countries to follow suit too – assuming they are interested in taking advice from us small fries.
To quote Mr Wickremesinghe himself: “The production should not remain truncated since the entire government can benefit if this is developed further.”
That’s an understatement if ever there was one! The whole world might see a revolution unlike any other once Sri Lanka becomes the ‘tech hub’ it was always meant to be!
Try and stifle your excitement folks because President Wickremesinghe has given hope where before we had none. You never know, soon enough Siri might actually start understanding our accents rather than giving us random search results instead.
We’ll keep our fingers crossed and let you know how things progress as they do. Until then, rock on Digital Promotion Agency, rock on!