So, let’s paint the scene: Indonesia and Sri Lanka’s foreign ministers sauntered into a meeting in Brussels on Friday. Still shaking off jet lag but fortified with a hearty breakfast of fried eggs and European sausage (presumably), they decided it was high time someone offered up an unsolicited life lesson to ‘mother knows best’, aka the European Union (EU).
They stepped forward valiantly onto their soapboxes, cleared their throats, glanced at each other out of the corner of their eyes – (don’t you just love political bromances? Kinda feels like Sherlock Holmes and Dr.Watson minus all the sleuthing) – before urging EU to “be more consistent.”
Like that predictably unpredictable friend who’s always RSVPing yes then bailing last minute due to another existential crisis, apparently our dear old EU needs a bit more regularity when dealing with international conflicts.
The foreign ministers from these two majestic Asian countries reminded us how this request comes hot on the heels of recent fiery incidents in Gaza. It seems they want Europe to deal with the Middle East like Ukraine – perhaps offer Putin some homemade stroganoff along with peacekeeping troops or maybe deliver passive-aggressive notes via carrier pigeon?
As much as my mind wanders—you would too if your day consisted largely of deciphering political gobbledygook—it is clear there cannot be any double standards when life hangs in balance. But what better way than adding humour to light up such serious affairs!
‘International Conflicts 101’
‘, I hear them say indirectly while subtly sipping their lukewarm espresso hoping for its caffeinated powers to kickstart real conversations amidst stuffy bureaucrats! The plurilateral dynamics among the EU, Ukraine and Gaza is some legit ‘Twilight love triangle’ material for them.
And this illustrious Indo-Lankan tag team isn’t done yet. They’re keen on banging their geopolitical drum to anyone who’ll listen, including Europe, the Indo-Pacific region and all those lovely folks over at Association of Southeast Asian Nations (ASEAN).
This tête-à-tête went down as ministers from around the world were in town. Kinda like a political speed dating game: you’ve got 5 minutes to convince me your perspective is worth considering before I move onto chat with Zimbabwe!
In all seriousness though, it’s laudable that these two nations are urging consistency in how global conflicts are handled. Even if their delivery knocks on satire’s door—just let us have our fun while we can because talking about conflict consistently without waning into despair is an Olympian level feat!
To every Brussels sprout whisperer out there still tweaking your organic cookbook recipe or those engrossed designing creative table-placements while negotiating trade policies – lend your ears to Indonesia and Sri Lanka for just one second.
‘Why Can’t We Be Friends’
‘, they softly sing – not figuratively; no one likes an impromptu karaoke session during peace talks! Rather, uttering words clad with shades of civil diplomacy mixed with mild exasperation confronting double standards when dealing with international affairs—a diplomatic way of saying “You can do better!”
You see friends; international relations aren’t easy-peasy lemon squeezy nor a piece-of-cake walk in park-type stuff—it’s more like doing cartwheels through a minefield… blindfolded…with ankle weights….during tsunami warnings kind of complicated stuff really.
As we chuckle between flabbergasted gasps drawing parallels between current global crises and telenovela plot twists, remember to appreciate the succinct message Indonesia and Sri Lanka delivered at this Belgian gathering: ‘unequivocal consistency’, their poetic mantra – one EU would do well to heed. MORE..
In conclusion, it appears that the Brussels meeting looked pretty much like an impromptu stand-up comedy night. If only they had a parchment labelled ‘roast session tips from diverse nations’ acting as cue cards! The intention behind all jesting though sincerely pleaded for consistent approaches in matters of global conflict resolutions.
A genuinely gallant effort by our Indonesian and Sri Lankan Ministers—it’s no easy feat offering up unsolicited advice when you’re dealing with such a delicate diplomatic waltz on international stage.
So here’s to hoping that amidst laughter-soaked hushed political whispers echoing through hallways of Brussels, real breakthrough may emerge—because sometimes the most profound wisdom can hide within humour’s jaunty folds!
But until then, keep your fingers crossed; because if dialogues were steps towards peace- we know who just performed an elaborate cha-cha slide routine!
Indonesia and Sri Lanka blast EU for double standards on Gaza