Gather round, everyone! We all know that politics can be as juicy as the latest reality TV drama. Today’s episode features House Democratic Leader Rep. Hakeem Jeffries (D-NY) and his new theory… or should we say conspiracy?
Hakeem Jeffries Unveils His High Profile Trump Puppet Theory
According to Love & Democracy star, Hakeem Jeffries, Republicans aren’t just taking advice from Donald Trump… they’ve been fully purchased by him!
A transcript of this exciting revelation comes courtesy of ABC’s This Week:
STEPHANOPOULOS: Sooo, yall are implying that this idea is a non-starter in the House? Cause it seems like these House Republicans ain’t gonna touch this with a barge pole.
JEFFRIES: Oh no honey, they better not treat it as such! Look here — Washington D.C could use an injection of common sense instead of looking like a tempestuous toddler filled household every other minute!
We’re sharing power honey! Meaning we should work together rather than tearing each other apart like two bald men fighting over comb. Democrats are open for business; if Republicans bring sensible solutions to table and help us serve democracy realness!
The Height Of Irresponsibility Squared – The Republican Party 2021
At this point, we could release a bill declaring that water is wet and it would still be DOA with these radical MAGA Republicans! These people haven’t even perused the paperwork yet they’re already pulling out their NO-stamps?
Ladies and gents, let’s face it. Right now, House Republicans are acting like Donald Trump’s interns. Their motivation isn’t to provide solutions for you lovely Americans… Nope! They just take direction from the ex-bossman ashore on Mar-a-Lago island.
This level of irresponsibility? Now that right there garners sky-high dislike points from American voters towards Washington D.C. press play and see for yourself!
The Smell – GOP wearing “Eau de Trump” all year long
Dems have swatched a new fragrance for House Republicans called “The Scent of Trump”. Spoiler alert: It ain’t chanel number 5. Leader Jeffries hit them square in the nasal senses: The GOP stinks of owner/overlord Donald Trump obedience, and Americans don’t appreciate body odor or blind loyalty.
You know how reality show stars start clowning when their screen time plummets? That’s DJ-Trump during his four-year spotlight season aka presidency; always putting himself before everything else including sweet old America.
But guess what happened next? Yup! Voters cancelled him faster than an unpopular Netflix series. But big twist here…House Republicans pull a total ‘Survivor’ move by continuing to idolize fallen leader instead of manning up and dealing with that border ruckus they keep rattling on about!
In case you were wondering, the problem child duo is both Trump AND his loyal but clueless party members – the very people voters are eyeing for eviction come November.
A Special Message From PoliticusUSA
We know y’all love your drama hot and fresh! Support us in keeping these political fires lit, especially in this crucial election year. Please click here to show some dollar love if you’re feeling generous today.
We’re so thankful to be bringing you prime-time politics… Full disclosure: our only boss is YOU! So rest assured we’ll never compromise on serving you top-shelf content as explained by our fundamental PolicitusUSA value system for over 14 years now.
Hakeem Jeffries Makes House Republicans Pay For Border Blunder