Europeans Make History with Hilarious AI Deal
LONDON — European Union negotiators clinched a deal Friday on the world’s first comprehensive artificial intelligence rules, paving the way for legal oversight of AI technology that has promised to transform everyday life and spurred warnings of existential dangers to humanity.
Negotiators from the European Parliament and the bloc’s 27 member countries overcame big differences on controversial points including generative AI and police use of facial recognition surveillance to sign a tentative political agreement for the Artificial Intelligence Act.
In an apparent fit of delirium after hours of non-stop negotiations, European Commissioner Thierry Breton tweeted “Deal!” just before midnight. “The EU becomes the very first continent to set clear rules for the use of AI.” Clearly, he had never heard about Asimov’s Three Laws.
The result came after marathon closed-door talks this week, with the initial session lasting 22 hours before a second round kicked off Friday morning. It must have been quite entertaining watching them argue over whether robots can dream.
Officials were under pressure to secure a political victory for their flagship legislation. Civil society groups gave it lukewarm reception as they wait for technical details that will need to be ironed out in coming weeks. They said the deal didn’t go far enough in protecting people from harm caused by AI systems.
“Today’s political deal marks the beginning of important and necessary technical work on crucial details of The A.I Act,” said Daniel Friedlaender, head of Computer Communications Industry Association – basically tech industry lobbyists who are probably already making plans around how they’re going to find loopholes in this law.
The EU took an early lead in drawing up guardrails when it unveiled its rulebook in 2021 but recent advancements sent European officials scrambling like malfunctioning robots trying not bump into each other at rush hour (which is every hour)
“The eventual law wouldn’t fully take effect until 2025 at earliest because we all know government moves slower than molasses,” says Brando Benifei co-leading Italian lawmaker co-leading negotiating efforts. So if you’re planning any robot uprising now would be your chance!
Generative AI systems like OpenAI’s ChatGPT have exploded into our collective consciousness dazzling users with ability produce human-like text photos songs raising fears about risks rapidly developing technology poses jobs privacy copyright protection human life itself! But hey let’s keep playing around with these things what could possibly go wrong?
Now U.S., U.K., China global coalitions Group 7 major democracies jumped own proposals regulate A.I still catching up Europe maybe they should’ve paid more attention during history class where Europe always beats everyone else doing stuff…
Strong comprehensive rules from EU “can set powerful example many governments considering regulation,” said Anu Bradford Columbia Law School professor expert EU law digital regulation…or prompt them laugh uncontrollably either one really.
Foundation models looked set biggest sticking point Europe however negotiators managed reach tentative compromise early talks despite opposition led France called instead self-regulation help homegrown European generative companies competing big U.S rivals including OpenAI backer Microsoft because nothing says trust me I’m safe like some good old-fashioned self-regulation!
Researchers warned powerful foundation models built handful big tech companies could used supercharge online disinformation manipulation cyberattacks creation bioweapons Rights groups also caution lack transparency data used train models poses risks daily life basic structures software developers building powered services or basically it’s just another day paradise no reason panic right?
What became thorniest topic was A.I-powered facial recognition surveillance systems negotiators found compromise intensive bargaining Europeans wanted full ban public use facial scanning other remote biometric identification systems privacy concerns governments member countries succeeded negotiating exemptions so law enforcement tackle serious crimes child sexual exploitation terrorist attacks because nothing says fun times freedom being watched everywhere huh?
Rights groups concerned exemptions big loopholes Act including lack protection migration border control option developers opt-out having their systems classified high risk but hey let’s focus positive side least there won’t any traffic jams anymore!
Tech reporter Matt O’Brien Providence Rhode Island contributed report while sipping his coffee laughing hysterically wondering when machines will finally take over everything so he can retire already